The Baby Red Zone

Howdy Kayleigh girl,

We are so excited!  You have no idea (how could you?) just how much your mother and I are looking forward to having you in our arms soon.  There are so many thing we can't wait to do with you, places to take you and people we want you to meet.  We are so close to getting to do all of those things that we are ready to go to the hospital at the drop of a hat.

Something I'm looking forward to sharing with you someday is a love for sports and games.  It is currently football season and I've been using a football term to describe how close we are to having you with us and how excited we are.  We are in the "Baby Red Zone."  The red zone is the end of the football field where a team pulls out all the stops (music and music terms are going to be fun to share with you too) to make sure they can get into the end zone and score.  We are so close to being together and your Mommy and I have been taking as much care of you as we can.  We've got your room ready to go, your clothes folded, crib set-up, and just yesterday we installed your car seat so you can come home with us.

Many others are excited to have you join us too and right now we have our families and friends and people we don't even know that well praying that God would bless you and Mommy with a safe delivery.  Every thing we do in the Baby Red Zone is an important part of preparing for you to come and we know that the best thing we can do is to stay connected with our heavenly father.  God is the glue that holds our family together and we are so happy that He has blessed us with you.  We know that you will always be in His care, but we are ready to have a new role in caring for you as well.

Stay safe and come to us soon Kayleigh girl!  God bless.

-Your Doting Daddy

40 Weeks, Salted Caramel Mocha Frappuccinos, and Inducing

Dear Kayleigh,

What a weird last few days it's been.

I went to the chiropractor on Wednesday. She adjusted my back, and just like that, the pain was gone. Yesterday was the first time in weeks that I woke up and thought, "I could walk a mile right now! Let's go!"

And go we did. Last night, Dad and I walked 1.5 miles in a hopeful effort to get you to come. Today was your due date, and we were sure hoping it wouldn't pass by uneventfully.

We walked to the Starbucks down the street from our apartment, and as a reward, we treated ourselves to drinks. They were passing out samples of the Salted Caramel Mocha Frappuccino, and it was really good! I ordered it in a tall--the first "coffee drink" I've ever ordered at Starbucks. I'm a tea girl. An herbal tea girl. If I don't order tea at Starbucks, I get a Strawberries 'n' Creme or a Frozen Strawberry Lemonade. Never coffee.

Coffee gives me the jitters. It makes me antsy and ridiculously hyper. I don't know what possessed me to order the mocha frappe last night, but wow! Like mother, like daughter. You were wired. I felt like I was a human pinball machine. For hours after I had my drink, you were bouncing around inside of me. I don't think I'll be doing that again :-)

We had our 40 week appointment today. Before we went, we walked another 1.5 miles. I was really hoping that walking 3 miles in the last 24 hours would get things going so that you would decide to come soon. Not so lucky, I guess. Dr. Morales didn't note any change in my progress from a week ago. 50% effaced, cervix still completely closed. He said it could be a few more weeks, at this point, if we were to let things go naturally. He scheduled us for an induction on Monday. I was crushed.

Even though I've planned all along to have an epidural, I wanted to do everything else as naturally as possible. No c-sections, no inductions. The ideas of both of them scare me. I'll just have to trust in God, Kayleigh Girl. He turned you around when we thought we would have to do a c-section; I can trust Him to be with us every step of the way through your delivery.

As things stand, Dad and I will head to the hospital around midnight on Sunday night so that they can induce me at 1am. Dr. Morales said it will probably be a very long journey--you might not even be born until Tuesday. Isn't it ironic that the very thing I've tried to avoid is what most likely will happen? Kayleigh Girl, you may very well be born on my 25th birthday.

I've struggled all along with the idea of you having to share a birthday in such close vicinity to mine. I'm a big believer that every child should have their own special day, and I never want your birthday to have to be "shared" with mine. I always want you to have your own cake, your own birthday party, your own celebration. And now, you'll either be born the day before, or on my birthday. Oh well! I promise to always make sure your birthdays are special. And if a beautiful baby girl is handed to me on September 27th this year, I'll consider it the most wonderful birthday gift I could ever receive.

Well, it's after 2:30 in the morning right now. I don't know if you picked up on my anxiety today, but neither of us has been able to sleep tonight, Munchkin. You've been stretching, hiccupping, and pushing around in your cramped space all night. It's crazy to realize that after tonight, there is only one more "normal" night where you will be inside of me. Sunday night/ Monday morning will be anything but normal for either of us, but I'm praying that God will keep us both strong, and bring you to Daddy's arms and mine soon. I can't believe how soon I'll be holding you, my sweet little one. It puts a smile on my face.

I love you!

Sweet dreams.

Love, Mom

A Perfect Day

Dear Kayleigh,

Yesterday was the day Daddy and I have been looking forward to for a long time as our last "Date Day" before you arrive. Up until two weeks ago, I had planned for this past Thursday (9/15) to be my last day of work (I'm so glad I caved and ended a week early! I would have been no good at school this week!) Why did I plan to end on a Thursday instead of a Friday? Because Fridays are Dad's day off [well, in theory, anyway!]

We guarded this Friday with our lives. Originally, we had planned on doing something like going to the Getty Center or the Los Angeles Arboretum--but by the begi

nning of last week, we both knew that I wasn't going to be up for anything that included a lot of walking.

Instead, we decided to do something I've been yearning to do for a long time: go to the beach.

It was a wonderful day!

We began it with an OB appointment (you little bugger, you're so content in there that Dr. Brady said you're probably not coming for at least another week) and then we drove to Newport to visit Papa Don in the nursing facility where he is currently rehabilitating.

Gramma got there just after we did, and we had a wonderful visit with the two of them.

I wish you could have seen how bright-eyed and smiley Papa got every time we mentioned you! It was so much fun to see his excitement. It's crazy to think that the next time we go visit them, we'll be bringing you along, too!

After our time with Gramma and Papa Davis, Daddy and I headed to our favorite bagel place in Corona Del Mar--Bruegger's Bagels on Goldenrod Ave. Ever since Dad and I started dating, Corona Del Mar was our special place. We'd go there when school got to be too much, we'd go there on quiet Sunday afternoons, we'd go to watch the sun set.

Here's a look through the years at our favorite place!

The first time Dad and I went to Corona Del Mar together--November 15th, 2006--a month before we began dating! With Kellie Kotraba and Dustin Gross (Auntie Kim took the picture)

Taking advantage of a cancelled orchestra rehearsal, March 2008



A week before our wedding, 2008

Our first Valentine's Day as a married couple, 2009

January 2010

And almost every time we went, we stopped at Bruegger's Bagels first. There's just something about sitting on the sand with a warm, creamy bagel and the love of your life. It's a perfect combination.

Aaaanyway, back to yesterday!

It was a perfect day. It was 20 degrees cooler at the coast than it was at home yesterday. I LOVED it!

There was a dad at the beach with his two little girls doing a photo shoot. They were the cutest things! It made Dad and me excited to think about times like this with you :-)

We loved talking about how next time we come to the beach, we'll be carrying you in our arms! I hope we are able to give you many, many opportunities to go to the beach as you grow up. The ocean is such a part of who I am, and it's become such a special part of Dad's and my relationship. We can't wait to share that with you!

We love you, Kayleigh Girl!

Slowing Down

My Kayleigh Girl,

Tomorrow is my last day of teaching before you are born. It doesn't seem real yet.

In my brain, I'm going to enjoy a wonderful weekend (taking Daddy to his birthday present-- an Angels vs Yankees game on Friday night--and the very last baby shower on Sunday afternoon) and then I'm going to wake up on Monday at 5:30am, hop in the car, and work with 4 year olds for 8 hours before making the hour-long drive home again.

It doesn't seem real that after tomorrow, my biggest responsibility is resting my body and preparing for you to arrive.

I'm ready. And so thankful. My body has changed so much in the last week that the girl who "barely looked pregnant" (according to most people) and could still bend over to pick things up, dance along to silly songs with her class, and tie the laces on little shoes has morphed into a woman who winces in pain with each step, and definitely has the "pregnant woman waddle" these days. It's amazing how quickly things changed!

But it's exciting, too. I know that the pain I'm experiencing is because my body is getting ready to deliver you, and that's an empowering thought.

You'll be here soon, Sweet Kayleigh, and I just can't wait.

Mornings are going to be so incredibly different when they begin with feeding you, spending time in bed with Daddy, and slow, yummy breakfasts together before sending him off to work...instead of the hectic rush we experience each morning right now trying to get me out of the door so that I don't get a big red tardy mark on my time-sheet at work. And for the record, I was parked by 7:25 yesterday, but got a red blotch on my time-sheet anyway because it took me longer than five minutes to make the painstaking walk from the street to the preschool. Grrr. This long-legged girl isn't used to being such a slow-poke!

I'm looking forward to next week. I'm going to get as much rest as I possibly can so that I will have all the energy I need when it's your time to come. Your Auntie Kim is coming to visit/keep me company for the majority of the week, and I'm picturing lots of relaxing, crafting, and movie-watching. Sounds wonderful to me!

The baby shower on Sunday is the last thing on my social calendar for September, so be a good girl and wait until your Oxnard family gets to celebrate you, but then come as quickly as you can!

I'll be ready.

I love you!

Love, Mom

What a Good Girl!

Dear Kayleigh,

God is good! You are good! What an answer to prayer!

We did it! I don't really know what did it, but I'd like to credit it to crazy things like this (just so that I don't feel ridiculous about hanging upside down on an ironing board with ice packs under my ribcage...)
We tried every trick in the book to get you to flip on your own, Kayleigh Girl. Let me tell you, that's a lot of head-rushes on my end, because nearly every DIY method includes being upside down in one way or another. Blech!

But...it worked! At our ultrasound on Tuesday, the tech said your head was down again. We're so happy! She also said you're measuring like you're already 39 weeks. What was my doctor talking about, worrying that you were measuring small?!?!? The tech estimated that you're already about 8 pounds. Whoa, girl! Slow down a little bit, ok? We have been given way too many teeny tiny clothes for you to come out as an 11 pounder :-)

If you are, we'll love you anyway!

Love, Mom

Pansies

Dear Kayleigh,

Last night, Daddy and I planted pansies. I love looking at them and knowing that their cheery purple, blue, and yellow faces will be there to greet you when we bring you home for the first time.

Pansies have always had a special place in my heart. I think I fell in love with them when I was about 10, and by the time I was in high school, my parents' backyard was overflowing with my pansies. I used to go out every morning and collect bouquets of them to place in little vases all over my bedroom. They don't last long in a vase, so I did it all the time. Papa Chuck (I wish you could have met him! I would have loved to hear him chuckle at your cuteness) caught on to my love for pansies and would buy them for me randomly. When I moved away to Concordia for college, he bought me a beautiful glass vase of the most realistic-looking silk pansies I've ever seen. It's still displayed with love in our home today, and 6 years later, people are still asking me if they're real.

Dad's first Valentine's Day gift to me was a window box full of cheerful pansies. That guy catches on quick! No dying flowers in a vase for me...I loved having the pansies outside my dorm door to cheer the walkway.

Ever since, planting pansies has been something we love to do together. Yesterday, as we selected just the right plants to put together and dug into our bag of soil, we talked about you. Dad said he was looking forward to taking you to a garden center in a few years and letting you choose your own favorite flower. I love that he thinks like that! We'll show you all the pretty posies, see what you like best, and then bring some home for your very own. Not that we're expecting the flowers you choose at 3 or 4 years old to be "your" flower for the rest of your life, but giving you ownership of something beautiful will give us both joy.

We hope and pray that you always seek out the beauty in God's creation. There are so many wonderful things to see...we just can't wait to show you!

But today, what makes me happy is knowing that when we bring you to our front door for the first time, there will be a cheerful assembly of colorful little faces welcoming you home.

We love you, Kayleigh!

Love, Mom

Transverse

Oh Kayleigh, you little stinker.

We went to the doctor yesterday for our weekly check-up. Last week (36 weeks) the doctor felt my abdomen and pointed right above my pelvis, saying "Her head is right here. She's in the perfect position for delivery!"

It wasn't any surprise to us. Doctors and ultrasound techs have been commenting since week 20 at how impressed they are at your perfect position. Nobody thought you'd be giving us any issues.

Sigh.

Yesterday, the doctor nearly gave me a heart attack when it took her significantly longer to find your heartbeat. I was so scared as she searched around my abdomen with the wand. I nearly cried right on the table (it didn't help that I really haven't been getting much sleep this week...baby girl, you're exhausting me!)

When she finally found your heartbeat, she said, "Hmm...it wasn't where I was expecting it to be. I think your baby might have moved." She brought in this dinosaur of an ultrasound machine (apparently, they only use it for emergencies) and started scanning under my ribs. Sure enough, she found your head tucked right under the right side of my rib cage. As she scanned across the top of my abdomen, all that we could see on the screen was your spine. And then when she got to the left side of my ribs, there were your feet.

Oh you. My heart sank.

Not only are you not in the perfect position anymore, you're in just the position that makes it impossible to deliver you naturally. Kayleigh!

As Doctor Rose looked at the screen, she said, "Well, we should schedule a cesarean for two weeks from now." Dad and I looked at each other. We had already discussed together how much we wanted to avoid a c-section. We asked if there was anything we could do to get you to turn so that we wouldn't have to do surgery (Aunt Laura was a breech baby, and Gramma actually got her to turn around by doing somersaults in a pool!)

Dr. Rose told us about a medical procedure called a version where doctors manipulate the baby's position from the outside. She told us that if we didn't want a c-section, that this was our best bet. She set up an appointment for us for the next day, and told us to prepare everything to bring home our baby, just in case. "There is a risk of rupturing the placenta during the procedure, or causing too much trauma to the baby and needing to do an emergency c-section," She explained. That sounded scary.

As I drove to work straight after my appointment, I started to cry. I called my mom's cellphone, knowing that she would encourage me and pray with me. Her phone was off and went straight to voicemail. I got ridiculously panicky (sleep deprivation+pregnancy hormones+scary doctor appointment=a messy me) and nearly hyperventilated on the 10 freeway. I tried Grammy and Papa's home phone, and when Grammy picked up, I burst into tears of relief.

"Beth--Bethany? Are you ok? What's wrong?" Grammy's voice showed concern as I cried and cried.

"I'm--o--o--k!" I gasped out between sobs. "I don't--want--to--scare--you!" I knew I needed to tell her that everything was ok, because the way that I was sounding over the phone was enough to put any mother into a panic. Finally, I calmed down and was able to tell Grammy the whole story. I felt really bad for scaring her like that, and was thankful for the peace she shared with me and the way she prayed over the phone for us.

After I hung up with Grammy, I called Dad (who was on his way to work, too) and told him I didn't feel good about the procedure. He agreed. It was all too fast, and we didn't have enough information about anything to make us feel comfortable with it. I was so thankful when he told me he would call the hospital and cancel for tomorrow. What a relief!

As much as I don't want a c-section, I would rather have a planned c-section than do a procedure that could result in an emergency c-section anyway. So, we'll see. We are all praying that you'll flip back on your own. God can do anything--and we're trusting in Him.

When I got home from work yesterday, I updated my facebook status to say "‎36 weeks=head down, ready to go. 37 weeks= transverse baby? Oh, Kayleigh, noooo!" People were so encouraging with their "Don't worry! She'll turn!" comments, but my favorite came from my mom:

"As I told you yesterday, she's just snuggling close to your heart, then when she's reassured that all is well, she'll go back down. Some girls just need to feel Mommy's love every once in a while. Keeping my cell phone by me at all times - just for you!"

I hope that I can be half the wonderful encouragement to you that she is to me.

You are loved!

Love, Mom